....today i will be bringing teatea's ashes home. I'm not a big fan of having "cremains" around the house...one of my best friends when I was growing up was 1/2 Japanese and her mother (who was an immigrant to this country and married to a frenchman...yes, they met during a war of some sort) had her parents cremains set up in a shrine of some sort in their bedroom and she used to have some sort of ritual (incense? candles?) that she used to go through...and as a non-Japanese 'tweenager, it quite frankly freaked meowwt. But since teatea was scared of the outdoors (whenever we tried to take her outside, she'd dig claws into our shoulders and try to run back in...just too big for her, I reckon.), burial on my wee place was out of the question (it is legal here.) The only place she ever wanted to be was with my husband and I, inside our wee home in the country. So now I have ashes. It is a strange thought, but like many other things in this process, my response has surprised me. The ashes are teatea's exoskeleton. If I'm picking cat hair off of my clothes and not wanting to put it in the trash bin, it's fairly obvious that these ashes are treasured because they belonged to her.
The box/urn/container. About 5 years ago, teatea had a bout with anorexea that took us to the emergency vet over thanksgiving weekend (NONE of my animals do anything between 8-5 monday thru friday. It's ALWAYS after hours or on weekends. And they say critters can't tell time....) and I thought her days were numbered then. I gathered my resources and even got online to pick a box/urn/container, because I figured I'd be too upset when the time came to take care of it. That thing has been hiding up in a closet for 5 years, gathering dust....I was obviously very lucky. What I wouldn't give for an extra 5 healthy years now. Sigh...anyhow, I hid that box from teatea, just incase she had gone out during the day while I was at work and taken a reading class....[= But today it will be taken out to use. I knew the day would come, but suddenly it's here. It's a simple wooden box with a frame in the front, so that the photo will look like a simple picture sitting there, but her ashes will be behind that photo. We'll keep it on the dresser, overlooking the bed, because that was her favorite place to be. And who knows....maybe freed souls look for a gentle place to rest every so often, and she will be called back to her own ashes seeking familiarity (kind of like in the movie Iron Giant!)...and there we will be, in that room, loving her the same as when she was here.
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